Thomas on Talkies #5

Today my fiends I will be talking about Tim Burton’s Dark Shadows. Thus far my posts have all been movies I really liked. That streak ends today!!

This movie was one of the many bombs to come out this summer. There were some huge movies and there were some good movies that did not pull big box office. This was the type of movie that lived up to it’s lackluster box office performance. When I first saw the returns for this movie I thought, “Maybe people just aren’t getting it.” Well I watched it, and I don’t get it!!!

Tim Burton is one of the most unique filmmakers working today. I will be a fan of his for a long time. He turned the summer of 89 into an event. He made Beetlejuice, Big Fish and Edward Scissorhands. All movies I really like. But on the flip side of the Burton coin sits Planet Of The Apes, Corpse Bride & Charlie and The Chocolate Factory a bastardization of Willy Wonka that I like to forget happened.

Then there is Dark Shadows…

This flick had a chance to make use of all of what makes Burton great. A fantastical sense of macabre, quirky characters and strange dry humor. It has none of these. The comedy falls flat, the pacing is horrible and the fantastical elements play lame and cheesy. This feels like what would happen if a film student tried to emulate Burton. It is lazy filmmaking.

There are some funny one liners, but they all play on the same joke. Collins is a stranger in a strange time. The highlight would be when Depp is seeking woman advice from a 15 yr old relative. After that, it just loses it’s flavor. This movie felt like cheap gum!!

I would like to point to a performance as the saving grace. Everyone is so ridiculously over the top I can’t.

The third act is predictable and the pacing is choppy. Even when there is a surprise, it’s hard to care or even see the necessity. Burton was even audacious enough to put in a sequel teaser.

So I hope that this will save you 1hr 48mins of your life. On to the top 5.

Top 5 creepiest Burton characters.

5. Danny Devito- Batman Returns
Who wants to follow Jack’s joker? Devito was simultaneously scary and drawing sympathy. Great performance.

4. Anthony Michael Hall- Edward Scissorhands
No make up, just a great performance. The former geek plays “that jerk from high school” perfectly.

3. Johnny Depp- Charlie and The Chocolate Factory
Or as I like to call it Charlie’s weekend at Neverland Ranch!!

2. Helena Bonham Carter- Big Fish
Dual role as the witch and the grown up girl who loves Ed Bloom in a way that can’t be reciprocated. Sad and haunting.

1. Christopher Walken- Sleepy Hollow
His character doesn’t even have a head for 90% of his work and only gets SCARIER when he does!! Great work Walken.

Thomas NOT on talkies #1

Normally I blog about movies. Today is not a normal day. Today marks the 11th anniversary of the most tragic day I can remember in the collective history of our great country. This is my generation’s equivalent to the JFK assassination. I’ve talked to my mom about that day and the fear and heartache were very similar.

My own feelings are hard to pin down. The main emotion I deal with is the incredible sorrow I feel for those affected By the tragedy 11 years ago. Every one who lost a family member in the tower, I pray that God has helped you with the loss, nothing I can say here can be of assistance. To every person who gave their life trying to save their fellow man, thank you and again I pray that God surrounds your family with his love, not just then, but for all time.

The second emotion I feel, and this is where I seek God’s help is rage towards those that made this happen. If I was placed in a room with any of them and a pistol, I cannot say that I would do the right thing. I am also very upset at the media treatment of this atrocity. I just witnessed CBS This Morning mention the attacks in passing (at most 10 seconds) and then go on to talk about gas price forecasts for 2 minutes. Disgusting.

There is a great documentary that the History Channel did, I think it came out last year. They compiled hours of footage and showed it chronologically. There was no commentary, no score, just the raw footage from that day. Some was news footage, some was amateur. But to see it presented in that format is powerful. The thing that always makes me cry is seeing a team of firefighters about to storm into the towers about 20 minutes before they collapse. No fear, just a heart to help those in need. Those men were God’s hands, feet & heart that day.

I guess I will try to squeeze a quick movie reference in here. There have been a couple attempts by Hollywood to use the attacks as plot points. Some very direct, (World Trade Center) some just use it as an afterthought (Die Hard IV) the most effective and human portrayal of this comes in the form of Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close. If you haven’t seen this movie, get a box of Kleenex and watch it!!! Quick trivia, the first major production affected by this was Spiderman. You can watch the first teaser on YouTube which was pulled, and Raimi added the scene where New Yorkers throw stuff at the Goblin to show the unity America felt at that point. Well played Sam.

I’ll close with this, never forget. Not only should we not forget the people lost and affected by this. But also don’t forgot what you felt that day and after. A piece of all of us died that day, a bit of America’s heart was ripped out and we can never get that back.

Thomas on Talkies #4.

There are 2 reactions I have when hearing about a celebrity death. The first is kind of apathetic feeling. The second is a feeling of oh that’s sad. The passing of Michael Clarke Duncan is definitely the latter.

This man had amazing physical attributes that made him a force in Tinsel Town. He was a very busy voice actor, and with his booming bass tones it’s not hard to see why. And he was a bear (no Armageddon pun intended) of a man. Which helped define his on camera work. I mean consider that the makers of Daredevil thought he was so perfect for the role of Kingpin that they changed the race of the character. (not saying there is anything wrong with it, but it’s a big deal) And would the Green Mile have been as heart wrenching if the role had been played by a smaller yet still huge man?

In addition to his chops as an actor and his unique voice, from everything I’ve read, he was a wonderful caring human being, which is what makes this sad to me. He was a gentle giant in a business that is not full of good people. I’m not here to ask questions like why did God allow him to die and Snooki to reproduce? There are mysteries in this world we will never understand. I am here to give props to a great actor and even better person.

My life as a movie junkie Is better for having seen his performances and for that MCD, I thank you.

Top 5 MCD performances.
5: Just because I think it is worth mentioning (again) his huge contribution to voice acting, I’ll place the 40 or so voice jobs he did together here.

4: Kingpin- Daredevil. Way to do an excellent job in an overall crappy movie. That takes talent.

3: Manute- Sin City. The opposite of Daredevil. In this film he was able to deliver a memorable performance amid a huge mix of talented actors.

2: Starkweather- The Island. Makes me want to cry when they take him in for “surgery” a rare feat for a Michael Bay film.

1: John Coffey- The Green Mile. I tried to find a way to not put this first since it’s the easy choice, but it’s just such a dang amazing performance I couldn’t justify it. Just think his fellow Oscar nominees included Tom Cruise, winner Michael Caine and Haley Osmet’s performance in the 6th Sense. If MCD had won, I doubt there would have been any grumbling!!

Thomas on Talkies #3

Today I am watching Love Actually. I have a soft spot on my funny bone for British humor. So this movie coming from the writer of Mr. Bean & 4 Weddings and a Funeral was right up my alley. Add a great cast doing great work and you have a recipe for an awesome movie. My wife and I consider this a Christmas movie, but one to watch after the kids are in bed!!!

Quick note this movie features the future Bilbo Baggins, Rick Grimes, Davy Jones, Ferb and a whole slew of great actors.

Keep in mind I am writing this as I watch it, so sorry if it’s a bit discombobulated.

The choir singing All You Need Is Love @ the wedding is awesome, but the type of thing that only happens in movies.

Liam Neeson is a BA. He can act anything, drama, comedy or action. It’s kind of sad watching him giving his wife’s eulogy considering what happened to him later.

Every time I see Alan Rickman on screen I expect him to say, “Going somewhere Mis ter Pot ter?”

Bill Nighy steals this movie and is hilarious!!!

The one thing I fin annoying in this flick is the political subtext. Basically a hidden middle finger to GW. If you are bold enough to insult the sitting US President, don’t be coy, be a man and do it directly. But seeing as how it’s Hugh Grant standing up to Billy Bob Thornton, I guess it can’t be taken too seriously.

With the exception of The King’s Speech, does Colin Firth ever play a different person? He’s like a British Tom Hanks!!

Great use of Dido’s “Here With Me” when Elizabeth Swann finds out that Rick Grimes is in love with her.

Why does every romantic comedy feel it necessary to have a huge downs to close the second act? Why can’t people stay happily in love for 2 hours?? (Snape is a tool ) that said, really like the way the loose ends are tied up in this one. Seeing just about everyone converge on the play is really well done.

As far as rom-coms go this one is in the upper echelon. I think the writing is witty, performances excellent & direction is spot on. Definitely a rewatchable film.

Top 5: romantic lines in movies I like.
5: Just stay alive. I will find you. -The Last of the Mohicans
4: I love you. I know. -Empire Strikes Back
3: You make me want to be a better man. -As Good As It Gets
2: In the words of David Cassidy, while he was still with the Partridge Family, I think I love you. -4 Weddings and a Funeral
1: You had me at hello. -Jerry Maguire

Thomas on talkies #2

Well movie fans I have decided to start doing a lot more with the blog. I will be continuing the top 5 as its my favorite part. However the focus of the blog will be whatever I am watching currently. I do not get to the cinema as much as I would like so expect most flicks to be those on DVD or bluray. For this one I’m going to write as I watch and give a summation at the end.
Today: Black Hawk Down

My view on this movie is a bit skewed. I had the honor of working with the 160th for a little over a year. I actually have met some of the soldiers depicted in this movie. Looking in their eyes, shaking their hands and talking to them has given me a unique perspective. Some of the casting is off eg having Lucius Malfoy play Steele is odd, but I guess the pool of men who look like mountains in Hollywood is a bit slim. I speak from experience that when Steele shakes your hand, you don’t forget it!!! But let’s get into the cinematic quality.

Ridley Scott is a legend. He has made some of the greatest movies of our time. Let me just say that my heart goes out to him and his family, I have only lost a parent, not a sibling and that whole ordeal is very sad. The first compliment I must give is the gritty realism in his films. In this one, the opening scene where people are shot just because they are hungry and the US soldiers have to just fly away, heartbreaking.

William Fichtner is an underrated actor!

The support cast is loaded. We have Legolas, Obi-Wan, the Hulk, Spud, Mr. Fantastic, Bane, the dad from Modern Family and many others. The standout performance of the movie out of this ensemble IMO is Eric Bana.

I won’t tear into the plot, If you want that, read the book (which is excellent) Scott does a good job of introducing a slew of characters quickly enough to get to the action, but deeply enough to make us care when the poo hits the fan. Action starts about 36 min in when the birds leave the ground and with the exception of a couple char development scenes, pretty much continues through to the end of the second act.

The pace of the action is good. The cuts aren’t too short and the use of the Bourne-style shaky can is limited. There are some stunning overhead shots that give scope to the movie. Nice balance of being real without being overly graphic. I also like that the score is used sparingly and is often quiet in the background.

Wrapping up the second act of the movie, it’s hard to watch what the Somali’s did to the bodies of the soldiers they killed. I remember watching that footage on Channel 1 News in high school and feeling that it was horrific.

The third act is mostly the quiet time at night ending with an almost anticlimactic extraction of the soldiers. But after the 2nd act, the action would have been hard to top. I’m glad they chose not to make up some peril just to liven up the ending.

There are many criticisms of this movie for not being historically accurate, very few movies that are. Scott did not take anywhere close to as many liberties as Gibson did with Braveheart. All in all I love how this movie portrays the American soldier. Great cinematography, great performances from the cast. Action an character development are done well without being rushed. So there you have it.

Top 5 unexpectedly great performances in war movies.
5. Willam Dafoe- Platoon
4. Eric Bana- Black Hawk Down
3. Edward Burns- Saving Private Ryan
2. Robert Downey Jr- Tropic Thunder
1.Matt Damon- Courage Under Fire

Thanks for reading.

Thomas On Talkies #1

So I have decided to start a blog. I know there are a million of these out here and I decided to follow one of my major passions: movies. In the content of this blog I will be giving reviews on movies in theaters, new to DVD/ Blu-ray, and picking selections out of the Netflix Instant pool. Also I will have a top 5 list with every blog. Feel free to leave comments suggesting categories for the top five and I will give credit where credit is due. I will post news on movies as it strikes me, however this will not be geek-central where you can find a spoiler every time a camera catches Christian Bale sneezing next to Anne Hathaway. For that coverage check out slashfilm.com or the IGN movies podcast. So here is entry #1.

The last movie seen at the cineplex was The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. This is the first movie I have ever seen that I would suggest seeing alone. It is not a date movie and under no circumstances should you ever watch this with your parents. The main thing that makes this movie so hard to watch is the fact that there is unnecessary sex scenes and  2 rape scenes in it and if these are easy for you to watch, I suggest a counselor.  I know that these are directly from the book (I have read all three) but they you can set up a scene and leave the rest up to the audiences imagination without having to see what is happening.What makes it easy to watch is a good mystery, great performances by Rooney Mara and Stellan Skarsgard, and a well paced script. It never slows down to the point of boredom and held my attention. They way to watch this one: Redbox it when you are looking to spend a night home alone.

My Netflix selection this time out is The Machinist staring Christian Bale. I watched this because I have become a huge fan of Bale, not due to Batman, although I love those films, but due to his Oscar winning role in The Fighter. So he plays a guy who hasn’t slept in a year and is slowly going nuts. He dropped 60+ pounds for this role (a record) and he shows me again why he is becoming one of my favorite actors.Make sure you note stuff that happens every time a clock shows 1:30.  The movie itself could be called I Know What You did Last Fight Club. But it is still worth checking out. The way to watch this one: With your honey after the kids are in bed, but with enough time that you won’t fall asleep and miss the payoff.

Here is my first ever top 5, and the category is the top 5 Christian Bale performances:

1. The Fighter (deserved the oscar)

2. Batman (either one was great despite his horrid Clint Eastwood ripoff voice when in the suit)

3. The Machinist (amazing performance in a slightly above mediocre movie)

4. Shaft (in a movie that is what it is, he and Jeffery Wright outshine Sam Jackson, cracks me up that Bale lists being called a MFer by Shaft as one of his favortie career acomplishments.

5. Empire of the Sun (at age 14 took direction from Speilberg and delivered an amazing performance)

Here you go, please leave honest feedback, don’t just kiss my butt because it will not get better if you do. Also comment ideas for top 5’s the more obscure the better, such as the top 5 featuring a great actor with an animal etc.

Thanks for reading and when it comes to movies, don’t be afraid to try new dishes!!!!